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Curiosity vs Repression



Reflections tonight: After repressing deep urges for most of my life, 7 years ago I began breaking free of religious dogma. I walked the Witch path, I aligned myself to the Moon, I practiced rituals devoted to questionable beings, studied books and texts that I now recognize as complete inversions of Truth. But each time I would have a big movement of understanding, a purge of an old system, an old wound, a deep-seated fear, it happened when I followed the pull of curiosity. Sometimes my intuition was clouded. Sometimes that curiosity led me to false information. But beneath that misguided path, there was a pull to understand Truth. Within the chaotic cloud of confusion, my Guides were trying to get my attention.


Every step of my path has brought me closer to Truth. The spiral inward to my True Self has had me pass through many fields of programming and inversion within me to get to the crystalline consciousness within. I expanded outward first, trying on every belief system and path I’d ever repressed curiosity for. Walking these paths that lay just off the True road, actually did serve a purpose and I did gain some understandings from those experiences, in the form of purging of those repressed wounds. I didn’t realize at the time that what I was seeking was expansion INWARD.


I would NOT advise looking for Truth in any of these paths I’ve mentioned 😂 But if you’ve had experiences like these, the Truth you’re seeking is just below the inversions. Go deeper in. Keep foraging and digging. Call on your Guides of the Christos-Sophia to illuminate your path with True Light. They’re with us even in the darkest places. I haven’t come to complete understanding in this body yet, but I do know that part of moving into True Gnosis is exploring the inner urges and emotions that lead to topics and areas that create curiosity within us. These are attached to deeper understandings of who we are, why we’re here, and what needs to be released.


Repression does not lead to understanding. Asking questions and exploring our emotions and urges within the safety of our Holy Mother and Father’s Light is how we come to know Truth. Inward and onward.

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